How many of you fellow ADHD’rs are still awake? It isn’t that I’m not tired, because I am, it’s 1:15 A.M. for heaven’s sake. So what is the deal with my brain refusing to shut up for five freakin’ minutes and let me rest??
Today was a really long day. DD has been having some serious mood swings. I am not going to attribute all of them to pre-teen angst, although I’m sure that doesn’t help, she’s been having a difficult few days of it with a certain member of her family that will remain nameless at this moment. So, she has been fine one minute, then then angry the next, then teary eyed. I let her sleep until nine this morning, and when I got her up, she moved as far as the couch where she promptly fell back asleep. I attribute the wanting to sleep to being pre-teen. I’m okay with that. Finally, she got up and we went to the shopping center because she has a dance at school next weekend. A formal dance at that. A FORMAL DANCE for MIDDLE SCHOOLERS?? Um…I don’t get it. BUT…being the awesome mother that I am, I want my child to be able to enjoy school activities (especially since this is the first year of her school career that she has wanted to participate in the classroom, worked her behind off academically, and tried to be friendlier. She’s always been the odd girl out when it came to the girls in her class, and she never fit in anywhere. So, pushover that I am, she has been really REALLY excited about this dance ever since it was first announced and I just could not say no.
Now, do you know how hard it is to find a dress for such an event for a middle schooler? Well, it’s hard. First of all, I didn’t want to spend much money on said dress. I hit the consignment shops and found nothing appropriate. I hit the Goodwill, and in our nearby stores, either the dresses were not appropriate, not her size, or were actually really dirty and disgusting looking. Ick. People, if you are going to donate your dress to charity, you really should clean it first. You just should. The problem with middle schoolers is that they are nowhere near as old as they believe they are. I do not let my daughter wear makeup, high heeled shoes, extremely short dresses, and as a rule, nothing strapless or off the shoulder. I see most of those things on girls her age, but it ain’t happening in this house. Then yesterday we are in the store and there are no dresses to be found that are not strapless, or have material missing from places that I am sure material was supposed to cover. She was already weepy from one of the run ins that I spoke of a minute ago. She finally just hung her head and said it was fine, she didn’t need to go to the dance. All the dresses were too expensive or not appropriate. A tear slid down her cheek and she took my hand and pulled me away from the dresses. Now, my kid knows that crying and being a brat won’t get her anything, but this was different. This was just dejected. This was not asking that I bend my rules, it was an acceptance that obviously the clothing industry no longer made what I considered acceptable and she was defeated. Against my better judgement, I pulled her back in, and decided we should have one more look. I saw this dress, the only one like it left. (I’m thinking she might see ten of them on her classmates.) It wasn’t bad. It was cute, actually, for someone a little older than my daughter; but that was the problem. Many dresses I’d found were cute – for someone older. I decided that maybe just this once, I should just let her wear something like all the other girls will be wearing. (Her school did send home a strict dress code for the dance), and grit my teeth and let it go. I asked her if she liked the dress. Her eyes lit up like the fourth of July. I told her to try it on. She said no. She said it was too much money and it was strapless. I told her to try it on, at least it seemed to have an adequate amount of material in all the right places. It actually looked really nice on her. I told her that even though I was not a seamstress by a long shot, I bet I could sew some straps onto it. She smiled. I told her she better like it a lot because she’d have to wear it again when she got to high school and was actually the right age for it. She promised she would. I told her to remember she said that when, in a couple years this dress will be hideously out of style. She just shook her head at me. She said it was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen and she would wear it A LOT. Optimistic about the number of formal affairs she will be invited to, I believe.
Okay…dress obtained. This morning had the thought that she had no shoes. So that’s what we went after today. She was still moody…bouts of tears alternating with non stop chatter. I was tired before we ever got to the shopping center. There, I broke my own rule number two. I bought her a pair of sparkly sandals with kitten heels. What in the world is wrong with me? Must be lack of sleep. We wandered the stores for a few other things, and her bleak mood that wasn’t really a mood persisted. She was trying to be pleasant. She was almost succeeding. Up and down. Up and down.
Once home, her mouth went into overdrive. I’d like to say I was listening to most of what she said, but that wouldn’t be true. I tried to work on our vacation plan…didn’t get far. I tried to work on my manuscript…didn’t get far. I tried to do some laundry…that reminds me, it’s still in the washer.
I had a plan for this blog post once upon a time. Now I’m not so sure what it was. Sorry folks, it’s nearly 2 a.m. and I just felt the need to ramble. Anyone else having end of the year dance dress dilemmas? I’ll talk more about the mood swings caused by a certain relationship later. Anyone else fight the mood swings that comes from a person in your child’s life that does their best to hinder instead of help? What do you do about it?
Okay, I’m going to go get some sleep now. I bought my kid a strapless dress today and the world is still turning. Imagine that.